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1. Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

2. In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”

3. At a Proctologist’s door:
“To expedite your visit please back in.”

4. On another Plumber’s truck:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber..”

5. On a Plastic Surgeon’s Office door:
“Hello. Can we pick your nose?”

6. In a Nonsmoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

7. At an Optometrist’s Office :
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

8. On a Maternity Room door:
“Push. Push. Push.”

9. On a Fence:
“Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!”

10. In a Veterinarian’s waiting room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

11. In the front yard of a Funeral Home :
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait. ”

12. On a Church’s Billboard:
“7 days without God makes one weak.”

13. And don’t forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop:
” Best place in town to take a leak ”